This post is somewhat of a biyearly tradition.  I shared it four years ago and then again two years ago … both times after visiting family in Michigan. Almost exactly two years later, I am posting it again. 

Things are somewhat different this time around as my wife and I now actually live in Michigan ourselves.  All of our children and grandchildren (and almost every one of our children’s spouses), gathered in our new home in our new (old!) state this week.  It was the first time in years we were all together. 

The last of them just left.  Which means we said a lot of painful goodbyes yet again, so it seems appropriate to share these thoughts yet again.   As always, I pray they bring some insight and encouragement to you.

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I hate goodbyes.  But then almost everyone does, don’t they?  Goodbyes to loved ones are rarely “good byes.”  In those situations, the word is the ultimate oxymoron.

This is a fresh and sensitive topic with me.  Recently I found myself saying goodbye to all of our immediate family members. 

They arrived at different times and left at different times … providing a 2-day window when we were all together. (Because of various circumstances, these precious visits occur only very occasionally for our family.)

Naturally, this initially led to multiple and heartfelt hellos.  Every new arrival brought joyful greetings of one kind or another; warm hellos springing from the shared bond of faith and family.  Vibrant hellos and hugs that reflect blood ties and past experiences, and which anticipate the wonderful things that the coming moments together will bring.

I love hellos.  Especially hellos to those people embedded deep in my heart.  But every hello in this world ultimately leads to a goodbye, doesn’t it?

Of course, there are a multitude of things to which we sooner or later bid adieu.  Houses, cars, places, experiences, jobs, schools … even previous health and appearance … can all merit “farewells” as we meander on through life.  And then there are those gut-wrenching goodbyes to our pets.  Make no mistake, some of these goodbyes can foster high emotion. 

But the worst goodbyes of all are the goodbyes to people we love. 

Why are goodbyes to loved ones so difficult?  Well, we thoroughly enjoy our time together.  Consequently, goodbye means a pause in those joyful moments, and often bounces us back to the reality of our other responsibilities and less enjoyable activities. 

However, that’s not the fundamental reason we hate goodbyes.  The real reason is very simple; we abhor goodbyes because we don’t know if we will be together again in this world.  The uncertainties of our earthly existence are ever-present in our awareness, and we all recognize that sooner or later there won’t be another hello. 

This inescapable fact rocks us.  It makes farewells to loved ones we rarely see agonizing.  But it even lurks in our consciousness with our day-to-day goodbyes … as much as we try not to think about it.  One can’t live a few years in this uncertain world without recognizing the uncertainty inherent in goodbyes.

My purpose in writing about goodbyes is not to bring anyone down.  Rather I want to underscore a few key points that I have fallen back on as I negotiate painful farewells.

Here’s the first one:  The fact that a person has agonizing goodbyes means that God has blessed them richly with dearly-loved family and friends.  Every close relationship in our life is a precious gift.  Each difficult goodbye we must endure simply emphasizes how profoundly blessed by God we are.

The second significant aspect of painful earthly goodbyes is that they encourage us to eagerly anticipate the day when there will never be any more goodbyes, but only hellos forever and ever.  This is such a foreign concept to us earthlings that we can barely consider it or comprehend it. 

But the day when God ushers us into heaven marks the end of experiencing goodbyes and the beginning of an eternity of hearing only hellos!  “Hello” to the Lord himself and Jesus our Savior.  “Hello” to the multitude of angels.  “Hello” to the great men and women of faith from the Bible and history.  “Hello” to our ancestors who lived and died in Jesus.  “Hello” to our family and friends who preceded us to heaven.  And “hello” to every family member and friend who follow us there!  Never again will we say “goodbye.”  Only “hello” over and over again forever and ever.

The Apostle John was given a glimpse of this wonderful heavenly home where goodbyes are gone and hellos predominate.

“And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look!  God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them.  They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God.  ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain [or goodbyes], for the old order of things has passed away.”  He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”  (Revelation 21:3-5) 

A goodbye to goodbyes.  Now that really will be a “good bye!”